


And I've Been Waiting For It

by Dogbaits



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Blow Jobs, First Time, First Time Topping, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, Shotgunning, Slow Burn, Some Side Pairings, Underage Drinking, beer pong, i really just ship all of them, slight age changes to fit the college setting, some implied past relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-07 21:19:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20458463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dogbaits/pseuds/Dogbaits
Summary: Hansol develops a crush on his new dorm RA.





	And I've Been Waiting For It

**Author's Note:**

> Dusts off this old ao3 account.... to post slowburn Jisol content? Where will my life take me next? I don't think I've ever actually written slowburn before but there's a first time for everything I guess. 
> 
> I wanna preface this by saying that I don't really have a preference shipping wise for SVT, just had this stuck in my head and I love all my boys. Shout out to my two friends for encouraging this and letting me send them scenes to look over and hype me up to finish. The title is from the song Simple Dude because I just associate it with this fic now. 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy.

“Are you-“ Hansol stopped to pant, momentarily winded as he sat the box of books with a heavy thunk on the side of his twin bed, “going to help me finish this or what?”

Seungkwan only turned his head slightly, giving his roommate an unimpressed look, before going back to what he was doing.

“I’m in the middle of something.”

He was in the middle of hanging a poster on his side of the room, which didn’t seem as important as finishing moving the boxes of their possessions from the hallway. But what did Hansol know? Seungkwan had stressed the importance of a well decorated dorm room, which he was taking very seriously now. Still, as soon as he had made sure the paper looked lined up properly, he stepped down from the desk chair he had dragged over to elevate himself, and started to take some of the (admittedly lighter) boxes in.

“Thank you so much,” Hansol gave him the fakest smile, but Seungkwan just rolled his eyes with a smirk.

Hansol hated moving in day, but to be perfectly honest, he was also excited. Freshman dorms, as a universal concept, _sucked_. His room had a leak in the corner the maintenance men always seemed to never be able to fix, the room he shared with another human being was essentially the size of a closet, and worst of all? The roommate in question never seemed to care all that much about his own personal cleanliness. He _smelled_ and stayed up all night blasting music, and Hansol had many a moment where he wondered if he’d even pass half his classes when he could barely get any work done in their loud, cluttered room. He had tried to reason with the guy on a couple occasions, but he was an awkward 18 year old paired with another awkward 18 year old so most lines of communication fell extremely short of their mark, and so he had just resigned himself to picking up where he could and investing in some ear buds.

It was like its own personal trial to see who was strong enough to not just flunk out, as staying in this fire hazard of a building was mandatory for all freshman, despite paying the equivalent of an apartment ten times the size. The second he had the forms in his hand to choose what dorm, and more importantly, his own roommate, he thought he just might cry.

Seungkwan was the obvious choice. They were mostly hanging out together anyway (and Seungkwan’s mandatory freshman year roommate was a lot more chill), and had dreamed of the day they could just live together. Luckily, the freshman dorm rule no longer applied to them, and while their new dorm wasn’t the absolute nicest on the entire campus, it sure as hell was bigger and cleaner and better than the last. After the mandatory last family dinners and goodbyes for the semester, their stuff had been dumped unceremoniously outside of their room and they were now spending the rest of their evening unpacking everything. It always sucked, but at least they could gripe about it together.

But griping had lead to distracting conversation about movies, which lead to them both wondering why they needed to get this all done now, and hey there’s a bunch of new movies added to Netflix so why aren’t we watching one of those instead? At least most of the items had gotten unpacked, and the semester didn’t start for another couple of days, so they could call it for the night. They both piled up on Seungkwan’s tiny bed, laying on their stomachs as they booted up his laptop to watch something.

Hansol had found himself nodding off halfway through Infinity Wars despite Seungkwan persistently nudging him awake to add some commentary to the scene, even though they definitely both had seen this movie when it was out in theaters with each other, when a soft knock came at their door. The two of them looked at each other, confused. It was nearing 9:30 at night and everyone else in the dorm had been too occupied moving in to introduce themselves.

“You’re closer to the door,” Seungkwan nudged him, nearly pushing him off the small bed. “And maybe it will wake you up.”

“Uh huh,” Hansol rolled his eyes but got up anyway, lest he totally get shoved onto the hard linoleum floor, and headed to the door. He must have taken longer than expected, because when he opened it, the person standing there blinked in surprise that it had opened at all.

The first thing Hansol noticed was that the boy standing in front of him was pretty. Really pretty. With a soft face and bleached dusky blond hair. He looked a little tired, eyes worn and soft mouth set in a small frown, but as soon as their eyes met, the corner of his mouth lifted into something more friendly.

“Hi, sorry, most people are either asleep or went out,” his voice was soft too, in a gentle kind of way. Hansol just stared, and the other gave him a mildly amused look as he extended his hand.

“I’m the RA for this floor, I’ve got to check to make sure everyone’s settled in all right. Are you...” he looked over a slightly creased paper in his other hand. “Seungkwan or Hansol?”

Seungkwan hung over the bed so he could take a better look at who was talking and waved with a light “I’m Seungkwan! Don’t mistake me for him. I’m much cooler.”

“Yeah,” Hansol shook his head and took the other’s hand a little belatedly, but giving it a firm handshake. “That’s- he’s Seungkwan, I’m Hansol.”

The RA looked amused but nodded, folding the paper and stuffing it into his pocket.

“I’m Joshua. I’m just down the hall in 314 so let me know if you need anything. Most of the people on this floor were here last year, I’m not used to seeing new faces. But we’re having one of those get together meet everyone things tomorrow night if you’re interested,” he seemed a little distracted, like this wasn’t the first time he’d said this tonight.

“Long day?” Hansol ventured, which made the RA laugh a little.

“Luckily, you’re my last stop of the night so I can finally get some rest. See you tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Maybe. Sure,” Hansol shrugged and that seemed good enough, because Joshua moved along after that.

Seungkwan gave him a skeptical look as he made room for the other to get back on his bed, “you’re really going to go to dorm orientation?”

They both knew that it was just going to be a bunch of college kids standing around in an awkward circle playing weird name games to learn more about who they were living next to. It wasn’t that Hansol didn’t want to get to know his neighbors, but the mandatory exercises were always so cringey and he wasn’t the most off the bat outgoing person to begin with. Still, there was one interesting perk in going.

“That RA..” he started, unsure of where he was going with this train of thought. “He was kind of cute, right?”

Seungkwan was ready to unpause the movie but stopped short, turning his head to give Hansol an exaggeratedly exasperated look. “Objectively? Sure. But no, you’re not doing that.”

Hansol gave him a confused look. “Doing what?”

“When you talked to me about being bi last year I thought you’d meet a cute guy in class. Not our RA, the one guy who can bust us for alcohol or parties.“

“We don’t even have any alcohol in the room-“

“_When_ we have alcohol in the room, he could.” Seungkwan countered before gesturing between his bed and Hansol’s. “And you should date someone who has their own place, I’m not getting sexiled because of you.”

Hansol put his hand over Seungkwan’s mouth with a long suffering sigh. His friend really liked to exaggerate, getting worked up from his own fantasies. Hansol had grown a lot since freshman year of college. Living away from your family and away from the usual people you see every day would do that. And in that year he had learned that maybe he wasn’t just into girls, but it was still relatively new to him and beyond a couple fumbling kisses at a drunk college party, he hadn’t really pursued any kind of dating with a man or a woman. It wasn’t going to magically happen now with some guy he just met, just because he could admit that guy was pretty.

“It was just a question,” Hansol laughed at his friend’s unamused look. He really hadn’t had time to think about those sorts of things beyond initial crushes and hey, this Joshua was pretty, that was an objective fact. Even though he hadn’t expected someone that pretty when he opened the door. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to go to the orientation. At least there was someone cute to look at.

** —- **

They had staunchly decided to spend the next day shoving clothes in drawers and halfheartedly putting books up, trying not to get too distracted from it. They had plenty to do, like sleep in, watch more netflix, and play games on the small tv Hansol had brought to set up on his desk next to his bed. Maybe they’d meet the rest of the kids on the floor once the semester officially started, or maybe they wouldn’t, but there were no plans of going to the meet and greet. Neither of them were feeling up to playing name games with overenthusiastic RA’s when they could just hang out normally and play games and meet people once classes started. That was the plan, anyway.

Except that of course Seungkwan’s stomach growled roughly around 6pm, and Hansol was feeling pretty hungry himself. Cup noodles could only keep you full for so long, of course, and dinner was sounding pretty good. The two of them decided to pause and venture out, hoping the dining hall was finally open for business. However, as they walked down the stairs towards the exit of the building, Seungkwan stopped short. Hansol, walking behind him at a much more leisurely pace, practically ran into his back. He let out a soft ‘oof’ but before he could ask why Seungkwan would just stop like that, the shorter boy whipped his head around, eyes wide.

“Did you actually read the dorm orientation invite?” He sounded frantic and Hansol raised an eyebrow at him.

“No, I just heard about it from that RA-“

“Oh my god,” Seungkwan gasped, pointing excitedly at the paper taped to the giant cork board by the dorm entrance. It was a big cheery sign, typed up with entirely too many exclamation points, that gave the information about where and when the orientation was. Hansol didn’t see what the big deal was, and his friend pointed again, this time tapping his finger against the most important part of the flier: Free Pizza.

“We have to go, it started like twenty minutes ago” Seungkwan sounded determined, checking his phone for the time. “And we should get there soon before the pizza is gone.”

It was such a cheap trick. Put free food in front of a starving college student, whose usual faire was lukewarm cafeteria food, and they will flock to anything. Hansol wasn’t immune to it either. Hot pizza from an actual restaurant sounded so much better than anything in the cafeteria. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad meeting the other people on their floor, and at least that RA was cute. But most importantly, they were hungry, and pizza was not a bad idea, so they turned around and headed towards the stairs instead, heading to the basement rec room where the poster instructed them to go. 

There was all ready a fairly decent gathering, random students all sitting around on the old, worn lounge chairs and couches. That RA had said that a lot of the people in the dorm had been there last year and it showed, since only a few of them looked awkwardly out of place with each other. Hansol was glad he at least had Seungkwan, it would have been overwhelming to go to this kind of thing alone, but his friend had all ready made a beeline towards the stacks of pizza boxes.

Luckily, despite there being a few empty boxes, there was still plenty of pizza left, and it hadn’t sat for too long either. Hansol laughed at the way Seungkwan’s eyes closed in pure bliss the second he bit into the slice of pizza. He had to admit, it was really really good, especially after an afternoon of instant noodles. And the best part was that it was free.

“You actually came.”

Hansol turned mid bite and really wished he wasn’t shoving pizza in his mouth right now, because Joshua was standing there watching him. The RA looked a lot more put together now, which didn’t help. His eyes were brighter, a lot less sleepy, and he was no longer wearing lounge pants. Skinny black jeans accentuated his long legs. Hansol locked eyes with him and desperately tried to get past the huge bite in order to answer, laughing a little awkwardly as he chewed. Joshua didn’t look away, watching Hansol try to compose himself, but the smirk on his face as he waited definitely showed he was more amused than anything else.

Seungkwan didn’t have the same shame, because he spoke with a chunk of crust in his mouth, “You didn’t tell us there was pizza, though. You should really start with that.”

Joshua broke away from watching Hansol try and collect himself, and gave the other a perplexed look. “I thought that would be a given. How do you think we get anyone to come to these things?”

“We’re starting now,” someone stood in the middle of the room, clapping his hands together to get everyone’s attention. It was another pretty boy (and how many of them stayed in this dorm? Hansol wondered), blonde hair bleached much lighter than Joshua’s and parted down the middle. He grinned easily as everyone gathered around him. “Everyone get into a circle. Don’t be shy.”

“Hello everyone,” he waved his hands around the circle once it was formed. Hansol had moved to stand next to Seungkwan, Joshua a couple people down from him on his left. The speaker in the middle seemed satisfied once they were all lined up. “I’m your second floor RA, Jeonghan. Welcome to dorm orientation!”

Jeonghan looked around and gave a fake huff of indignation when the clapping was sparse. Someone shouted out ‘we did this last year, we’re only here for the free pizza’ but the blonde ignored him, running a hand through his hair as he assessed the less familiar faces.

“_Anyway_, yes, there’s plenty of free pizza. But we’re here to get to know our floor mates too. So we have some games to get to know each other, you excited?” He moved on before the couple awkward ‘yeahs’ could settle in. “Joshua is going to be handing out name tags. Instead of your name, you’re going to write three descriptors about yourself like your age or your major or favorite movie or whatever. Then you’re going tofind someone who doesn’t match more than one descriptor, and talk for a couple minutes about yourselves. That way they have a name, face, and some trivia to remember you by. When we meet back up, you’re going to tell us that person’s name and what you learned about them. Got it?”

It was easy enough, the name tags being passed out with a couple of sharpies. Hansol scratched his temple with the cap of the sharpie and thought for a moment. The first thing he wrote was his major, music production. He had always been interested in hip-hop, writing song lyrics down in his notebooks when he was bored in high school. Music writing and production seemed just up his alley. Second, his age (19), and finally that he had a younger sibling. Those seemed good enough. He slapped the name tag on his chest and looked around the room. It would be cheating to talk to Seungkwan, and besides, the other was all ready across the room talking to someone animatedly. His friend was funny and smart, always good at drawing in a crowd. It wasn’t that Hansol was bad at talking to people. He considered himself a pretty easy going person and could keep a conversation easily. Large crowds of people still weren’t completely his thing though.

He felt a tap on his shoulder, and he turned to see Joshua, who glanced down at his tag the second he spotted it. Joshua’s read _Age: 21, Major: Music Composition, Likes: playing guitar _in almost perfect cursive. The older boy looked over the name tag thoughtfully before dragging his eyes back up to Hansol’s face with a soft smile.

“Well, we have one in common. Since I’m your RA, I figured I’d ask about you. That cool?”

Hansol couldn’t help it, he looked a little surprised that Joshua had sought him out, especially after witnessing him stuffing his face full of pizza. He didn’t know him that well yet, but Joshua seemed kind of reserved, his amusement at Hansol and Seungkwan’s antics probably born from having to deal with younger rowdy dorm kids in the past. But he had sought the younger one out first, and that made Hansol’s face burn a little at the thought.

“Yeah,” Hansol shrugged, trying to go for casual. It made sense, they had all ready met once before, and it probably wouldn’t hurt to know the guy who was going to be doing your room inspection once a month. “You’re a music major too?”

“Yeah, I used to sing at my church a lot,” Joshua laughed. “But mostly, I like singing and playing guitar so I’m focusing on composition. You?”

“Well, I write my own lyrics and I want to get into making my own music, so writing and producing is my thing. I can play the guitar too, actually, but I’m more interested in like hip-hop and all that.” Hansol watched as Joshua nodded along, watching him speak.

“That’s weirdly unsurprising, actually.”

Hansol couldn’t help but grin a little wider. “Oh yeah?”

“I don’t know,” Joshua shrugged. “You have that vibe I guess.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

Joshua gave him an assessing look, head to toe. He ended with a small smile, looking Hansol in the eyes as he spoke. “No, not at all. It’s cool.”

Hansol couldn’t help but grin at that, enjoying that Joshua thought something about him was cool. And talking to Joshua was surprisingly easy. The older boy seemed a little aloof at first, intimidating even, in how pretty and put together he looked, but he easily listened to Hansol. The fact that their majors weren’t all that different helped. It was an easy ice breaker, and with Joshua being a couple more years into the program, he had a lot of opinions on what classes were useful and which teachers to avoid if possible. This was his second year of being the RA at this dorm, he was a single child, and apparently had been raised pretty religious, though he didn’t dwell on that point too much. Hansol talked a little bit about his parents, his younger sister, and movies that he liked. He had completely forgotten that they were on a time limit.

“It must be hard having to keep up with everyone who lives here all the time, huh? Getting to know all new people every year.”

“No, it’s kind of interesting, you get to meet some cool people, and Jeonghan’s actually a really close friend of mine so he helps out a lot,” Joshua pointed at the other blond, who was currently smiling sweetly at something the girl talking to him was saying. “I used to be like, super lazy and not really do anything outside of class so this at least gives me something to do, you know?”

All Hansol really did after class was play games or sleep, so it was pretty cool that Joshua did anything extra after class like that. He couldn’t imagine it was easy, having to constantly be on alert for people causing too much of a ruckus or sneaking in alcohol. Hell, Hansol knew that it was only a matter of time before Seungkwan either snuck in his own booze or got too loud yelling during an impromptu fighting game match at 3am, so it probably wouldn’t be too long before Joshua was knocking on their door. Though he was smart enough to not bring that up as they talked.

“Ok, everyone, that’s time!” Jeonghan shouted over the rabble and Hansol blinked in surprise, not realizing their time was finally up. “Let’s get back together and remember, the quicker we get through this, the quicker you all get to finish that pizza and go do something else with your time.”

That did get some cheers from people who clearly had been here the previous year and Jeonghan whined at them all to stop it and get back into the circle and point out who they talked to in order to start the introductions.

“Make sure you say something nice about me,” Joshua tapped his hand against Hansol’s shoulder with a grin, before moving over to a beckoning Jeonghan, who gave Hansol a questioning look before directing his focus back to Joshua, who completely ignored his look.

** —- **

The next couple of days blurred by, much too fast for Hansol’s liking. Classes started, and with them came lengthy trips to the school bookstore, too many papers to keep track of, and a new found appreciation for the ability to sleep in because somehow the only time to take one of his mandatory classes was 8:30 in the morning. Seungkwan wasn’t much help in the waking up department, as he would actively hit his own alarm several times until he had maybe barely five minutes to make it before classes started, and he didn’t even have a class until 10.

On the plus side, Hansol had gotten to meet some of their dorm neighbors, like Soonyoung, who also had an early class though you’d never know it from his enthusiasm. They’d leave around the same time, though Soonyoung actually looked put together and ready to enjoy the day, while Hansol’s hair would barely be brushed and he’d still be half in pjs. The older boy would always tease him for seeming way too laid back for barely making it to his classes in time, but that had sprung into an easy friendship.

As for Joshua, Hansol barely saw him around the dorm during the day. Classes had just started but the RA seemed to always be out, only making an occasional appearance to make sure everyone was doing all right. The most Hansol got to talk to him was at their first monthly inspection, and since he and Seungkwan had just started the semester and were both nineteen, there wasn’t really anything illegal hidden in their room. Still, Hansol at least attempted to push the dirty laundry on his floor under the bed, knowing that he didn’t want to come across as a complete slob.

Joshua had lingered in the room momentarily, and glanced at Hansol like he wanted to say something. Hansol could feel his face heating up again, sure that the older boy was about to chastise him for the state of his room, the clothes on the floor and the cups that needed to be thrown away. It had been an entire summer of not having to deal with school and dorm life, and he hadn’t had time to catch up on taking care of cleaning up yet. He told Joshua such, laughing a little as he used his foot to push the dirty clothes a little further under the bed.

“It’s not the worst I’ve seen,” Joshua snorted, and as if to make his point that he didn’t believe Hansol’s room was a biohazard, he sat down on the other’s bed easily. “And really, I’m not here to tell you to clean your room. I’m not your mom.”

Hansol laughed again, though he was more than a little distracted. Joshua was sitting on his bed, completely unprompted, and on top of that, they were alone. Seungkwan didn’t care that there was an inspection, citing that he had nothing to hide and for Hansol to just let Joshua in. He had gone to the corner store for snacks. Hansol wondered if he had done it on purpose just to laugh at how awkwardly Hansol would squirm being alone with Joshua. It’s not like he had talked all that much about him since the orientation. He just couldn’t help if sometimes he glanced over to Joshua’s room, wondering when the RA would be around again.

“Thank god for that, my mom would be all over my ass if she saw this place now.”

There was a pause between them. Joshua seemed perfectly content to just sit there on Hansol’s bed and Hansol…. He wondered if it would be weird to just stand there or if it was better to sit as well. It was probably definitely weird that he was just standing there. So he sat, keeping his distance and pulling out his phone to fiddle with it while he thought of what to say.

“So how’s classes going?” Joshua said it jokingly, resting back on his elbows so he could watch Hansol, who just grinned and rolled his eyes.

“Now who’s acting like a parent?”

“What?” Joshua scoffed, sitting up. “I can’t take interest in how my junior’s doing? I’m a cool older mentor figure, you know. I’m valuable.”

Joshua closed the gap between them, bumping his shoulder against Hansol’s playfully. They laughed like that for a moment, shoving at each other. Hansol wasn’t expecting the contact from him, wasn’t expecting Joshua to feel so warm next to him as the older boy scooted even closer to give his pushing more weight.It was nice, and Joshua was cute, and for a brief second Hansol wondered if this was one of those moments, the kind with a big **TM** stamp at the end, where you turn and casually ask someone cute if they’d like to go out sometime. Was Joshua even into guys? Hansol didn’t want to assume. But it wouldn’t hurt to ask right? He didn’t have anything to lose, right? Except maybe a little bit of dignity if he was rejected. Girls were hard enough to figure out, but finding out that guys were just as viable an option was somehow even harder.

“So.” Hansol started smartly, and Joshua turned to watch him closely. That was a mistake. They were so close now, mere inches apart, and Joshua was giving him his full attention with a soft smile. It made him lose his nerve almost instantly.

“So?” Joshua raised a brow at him, and every part of Hansol’s mind was screaming ABORT MISSION because who the hell was he to ask his RA out? His RA who might not be into guys or might not be into him. His RA who was older and mature and cool.

Hansol cleared his throat. “You play guitar right? Do you have one here?”

Joshua blinked at that, looking a little taken back for some reason. It did come out of nowhere, but Hansol did remember talking about it with him at the orientation and it was something to distract from almost foolishly asking Joshua out.

“Yeah, you’ve never been in my room, but yeah it’s there,” Joshua sat up a little straighter, making room between them again so he could turn and reply. "I could show you how to play sometime if you want? My room is a lot cleaner, too.”

“Ok Mr. Perfect Mentor RA with the super clean room,” Hansol lifted his chin, giving a haughty look as he put on his best impression of a snob. “I’ll have you know I can actually play, too. I don’t need your help.”

Joshua smirked at him, giving him a challenging look as he pushed at Hansol’s shoulder with his hand. “That so? Maybe you can play for me. I’ll see how good you are at it.”

It seemed like maybe they’d go back into that casual touching, which Hansol had to admit he didn’t mind, but the door opened and in walked Seungkwan, mid asking how the inspection went. He saw the two of them on Hansol’s bed, Joshua’s hand on the other’s shoulder mid another push.

Seungkwan gave a huge sigh, dropping his corner store snacks on his bed. “If you two wanted to make out, you could have just texted me not to come back yet.”

“We weren’t- we were talking. Hanging out,” Hansol sputtered, face growing hot as he got up off his bed. He glanced down at Joshua, who had an unreadable look on his face. Had Seungkwan’s joke made him uncomfortable?

“I have to get back to the inspection, actually.” Joshua said lightly, getting up off the bed with a little stretch. “You two passed by the way. Good job.”

He patted both Hansol and Seungkwan’s shoulders as he passed by, but he gave Hansol a challenging little look.

“I still want to test those guitar skills of yours sometime.”

** —- **

Most frat parties were stuffy affairs, reeking of stale sweat, beer and vomit. Joshua never really saw the appeal of it, especially after his first experience freshman year. The sweat drenched and overpopulated crowd of strangers amassing in the hallways just to get some free, lukewarm beer was way more trouble than it’s worth. Luckily, he had soon met Jeonghan after that, who had introduced him to people who were a little less disgusting.

It wasn’t that this place was tidy by any means, they were still a bunch of guys trying to get to class and feed themselves and function as adults. But it felt way more inviting and way less bro-y and at least Joshua had some close friends he could sit with when friends of friends of friends started to flood in. It was the first major party of the semester, and that usually invited every type of student, especially the kind who couldn’t legally supply their own booze. Right now, there were a ton of people in the living room and the hallway, but it wasn’t enough people to start trickling into individual bedrooms, and so Joshua sat relatively undisturbed on the bed.

Jeonghan pushed the door open with his hip, hands preoccupied with solo cups full of whatever the hell was in the punch he had made for the party. It was most definitely sweet and fruity and deceptive, not tasting nearly as alcoholic as it was. They had all ready been drinking some of it earlier when they were setting up, and Joshua could all ready feel it. Jeonghan passed one of the cups to him and sat down with a contented sigh.

“Where’s Seungcheol?” They were in his bedroom, sitting on his bed, but Joshua had only seen him briefly when he got there. Usually, if Jeonghan was around, Seungcheol wasn’t too far behind. They were that kind of couple.

Jeonghan shrugged, waving it off. “I think he’s still in the kitchen? Who knows. But where’s your boy?”

“What boy?”

Jeonghan gave his friend a withering look. “You know. The cute one on your floor. The one you won’t stop making eyes at.”

Joshua rolled his eyes. Right. Jeonghan was perceptive, and had picked up on his friend’s interest almost immediately. He also knew that Joshua tended to fall for boys who were very very not interested in men, or only really wanted to test out if they were while very drunk. It was starting to get annoying. He huffed at his friend’s knowing look.

“He’s… cute.” Joshua ended lamely, deciding he needed to be a lot drunker for this kind of conversation. He took a huge swig of punch before he continued. “And funny and I like talking to him. But I don’t know, I don’t think he’s interested. It’s not like I’m being very subtle when I talk to him.”

Jeonghan gave him a pitying look and an encouraging pat. “I mean you could always just ask. Worst thing is he says no. Some guys just need that extra push.”

“We live down the hall from each other, though,” and yeah the alcohol was most definitely hitting a little bit now, because Joshua whined, pushing his head into Jeonghan’s shoulder. “What if it makes things weird? Or he’s super straight and doesn’t appreciate getting hit on? That’s a whole year of awkwardly trying to avoid this guy and I'm his damn RA.”

“Yeah, I suppose that’s a very real possibility,” Jeonghan acquiesced. “I suggest another drink and a brainstorming session. You in?”

There was a brief knock on the door and Seungcheol finally appeared, poking his head in. He gave them a curious look but didn’t question what they were doing sitting off by themselves. Instead, he gave Jeonghan a knowing smile. “Chan’s here, just so you know.”

Jeonghan lit up, standing from the bed and heading to the door. Joshua didn’t even have to wonder if Jeonghan spotted him. He could hear his friend loudly proclaiming “is that my baby?” with Chan’s very audible groan following after. Perhaps it was time to rejoin the party, and get another round of drinks.

** —- **

Soonyoung had caught Hansol on a Thursday when they were both up bright and early for class, and had casually invited him to his first party of the year. One of the frat houses was hosting the first big party of the semester, and according to Soonyoung, it was both a much cleaner and chiller place than some of the other houses. Hansol had then passed this information to Seungkwan later in the afternoon, who informed him that they had all ready been invited by people Seungkwan knew. It was settled, they were going to the first party of hopefully many. They stood by the entrance of the dorm, waiting for Soonyoung, who arrived with another boy in tow.

“Hey everybody! This is Chan! He’s in my dance program, I invited him along.”

They made their introductions and headed out. It was an easy walk across campus from their dorms to the frat houses. The evening air was nice, just a little cool now that fall was starting to settle in, so Hansol had just decided on a beanie and sweatshirt with joggers. He preferred being comfortable, especially if drinking was going to be involved. 

It wasn’t hard to spot the house they needed to enter. There were all ready a couple of kids sitting on the front porch, and music filtered through the front door into the street. It was lively, but it didn’t look overwhelmingly crowded yet, and the party at least seemed a little self contained. That would certainly change before the night was over, but it was nice to not feel so jam packed just yet. Soonyoung led the way, Chan following comfortably behind, and they all entered the house.

The inside looked like it had been cleaned up, or at least an attempt had been made. The music was louder now, bass thumping from large speakers set up in the living room to the left. Soonyoung shouted over the music, letting everyone in earshot know that he had arrived. Chan rolled his eyes but laughed along with it, talking to a few people they knew.

“Is that my baby?” Hansol recognized Jeonghan’s voice coming from down the hall, and soon the blond RA was strutting towards Chan, who groaned at him to quit it. Jeonghan persisted, though, grinning as he grabbed onto Chan and repeated the question, but as soon as he turned and saw Hansol, his grin turned into a smirk.

“Seungcheol?” He said sweetly to one of the people Soonyoung and Chan had been talking to. He looked a little wary at the other’s tone, but he came over. “Go tell Joshua his friend is here.”

Something like realization dawned over Seungcheol’s face and he gave Hansol a curious look but went back down the hall anyway. Hansol, however, was caught on the fact that Joshua was here, which was kind of stupid to be shocked by. Of course the older boy would be at such a big party, especially if Jeonghan was here, and he probably knew most of the other people in attendance. Still, if Hansol had known, maybe he would have come more prepared, maybe had done something with his hair instead of forcing it under a hat, maybe pulled something from his closet that looked more presentable, maybe taken a shot of something earlier for courage-

But then there was Seungcheol walking back with Joshua, who looked a little confused until he looked up and locked eyes with Hansol.

“Hey,” Hansol waved, resisting the urge to elbow Seungkwan when he heard his friend snicker beside him.

Joshua looked a little surprised, turning to give Jeonghan an exasperated look. The other just shrugged, untangling himself from Chan to press up against Seungcheol with a conspiratorial grin. Joshua looked like he was about to say something to him, but changed his mind, turning back to Hansol and raising his cup up.

“Hey,” he said over the music and all the conversations around them. “You want a drink?”

** —- **

“Uh,” Hansol said smartly, taking the cup of punch. He sniffed it, but he couldn’t tell just by the smell what was in it. There were lots of bottles of liquor in the kitchen, though, so it was a fair bet that some of that ended up in this drink. “Is it cool that I’m...?”

Joshua looked confused before the question dawned on him and he laughed, patting Hansol’s shoulder reassuringly. “We aren’t in the dorm, so I don’t really care what you do outside of it. Just don’t go so hard it becomes a problem back in your room, ok?”

“Promise,” Hansol put his hand to his chest and took a sip. It tasted sweet, not really anything like alcohol. That could be dangerous.

“I really didn’t know you were going to be here,” Joshua leaned against the counter by the punch bowl. He looked much more put together than Hansol felt, skinny jeans and a comfortable looking oversized button up. It made his frame look even smaller, it was cute. As always, Hansol thought he looked very cute.

Right, Joshua was talking to him. He blinked and took another long sip. “Soonyoung invited me, actually. That a problem?”

“No,” Joshua stood up, grinning as he stepped a little closer. “I’m glad, actually. We haven’t gotten a chance to hang out that much. I’d like to.”

They were so close now, Joshua looking at him with that soft little smile that he really liked to look at. Hansol gulped, but shot for his own little grin. “Good to know I’m not too lame for you.”

"What?” Joshua sounded genuinely surprised by that. “I like hanging out with you, you’re not lame.”

People came and went from the kitchen but neither of them seemed to notice, even when someone passed Joshua to get to the punch bowl, forcing him to step even further into Hansol’s space until they were almost touching. His hand moved to hold onto Hansol’s shoulder to steady himself as the person moved away, multiple cups in hand. Joshua teetered a little on his feet and Hansol grabbed at his sides to keep him steady.

Joshua laughed a little, steadying himself, hand still on Hansol’s shoulder like he hadn’t noticed the contact. To be fair, Hansol’s hands were still on his sides. It was just in case he lost balance again, is what Hansol wanted to think, but he couldn’t help but think that Joshua was warm against his palms, and that it was nice to touch him. In fact, he wouldn’t mind if they got even closer, just to keep from getting in the way of the drinks too much, of course.

“Sorry,” Joshua laughed again. He wasn’t drunk but he was certainly tipsy, and maybe it was kind of his fault for standing right beside the drink counter. He couldn’t complain though, not with how close he was to Hansol now, pressed almost to his chest, the other one’s hands on his hips. Hansol’s grip was soft but firm, and Joshua wondered how it would feel if he tightened his grip, pulling them closer together.

He shook his head to clear it, looking up, eyes locking on Hansol’s. They were so close, it wouldn’t take much to close the gap completely, and Hansol wasn’t moving him away. In fact, it almost felt like Hansol was pulling him closer. Joshua tilted his head, feeling himself move forward.Maybe it would be okay, maybe if he stepped forward he could-

“Hey,” Jeonghan poked his head into the kitchen. Plenty of people had come and gone around them, but this was the first person to acknowledge them directly. Hansol jumped back with a start and Joshua let out a small aggravated sigh. To Jeonghan’s credit, at least he looked slightly ashamed at interrupting. “Uh, sorry, I can come back if you’re busy.”

“No,” Hansol said it quickly. He could feel the back of his neck heating up at yet another misunderstanding between them.

Joshua huffed. He looked mildly annoyed but the expression smoothed out quickly. “No, you’re good. What’s up?”

Jeonghan looked about to comment on that, but changed his mind, instead giving an apologetic smile. “We got the beer pong table set up, you in?”

**—-**

“Have you played before?” A corner of the back porch had been turned into a beer pong area, a big folding table set up with multiple solo cups. Apparently a couple of rounds had all ready been played, so now Joshua and Hansol stood on one side of the table, and Chan and Soonyoung stood on the other side. 

“Once,” Hansol admitted. “I mean I was really drunk so I don’t remember much.”

A brief introduction of the rules was given to Hansol and Chan and they set up their cups. Hansol wondered where all the tension between them in the kitchen had gone. Maybe it was just wishful thinking that it looked like Joshua was going to kiss him. Then Joshua leaned in with a playful smirk, pressing up close to whisper in Hansol’s ear.

“I know a way we can win, if you’ll let me,” he whispered and Hansol suppressed a shiver at how close they were. He turned slightly to give Joshua a curious look.

“Sure?” He matched Joshua’s conspiratorial grin even though he had no idea what the other was planning.

“Hey!” Soonyoung barked out, pointing at them from across the table. “What are you two conspiring about?”

** —- **

Hansol was… ok. It was a lot harder than it looked, especially when he had to drink every time the other team got their ball in the cup. He had been completely distracted by the moment in the kitchen, where it really looked like for a brief moment Joshua was going to kiss him. It was most definitely nothing, but he couldn’t stop thinking about how his hands were on Joshua’s hips, how their faces were just inches apart. It made it hard to focus and Soonyoung and Chan were pretty damn good for being drunk, especially Chan, who seemed to have an eye for where to toss the ball. They were neck and neck for a while, just a few cups between the two teams, but at this rate there was no way they were going to win.

Joshua moved his lips against Hansol’s ear again, unexpectedly, this time so close he could feel the older boy’s grin against the shell of his ear. “You kind of suck at this.”

If Hansol knew any better, it almost sounded a little teasing. He moved away just enough to watch Joshua watching him with a smirk, fitting himself comfortably against Hansol’s side.

“Like I said,” he said despite feeling like his mouth had become very, very dry. “I’ve only played this once.”

“I told you I know how to win, though.”

Joshua sounded smug and Hansol gave him a challenging look. “All right, show me then.”

Joshua turned to him, pushing until there was no longer space between them, his smirk against Hansol’s neck. Hansol shivered at the sensation of Joshua’s mouth against his throat, but he didn’t back away. Encouraged, Joshua nuzzled up against his neck with a content sigh, hand coming to rest at Hansol’s lower back.

“Gross!” Soonyoung yelled dramatically, grabbing onto Chan, who looked a little flustered at the display of affection.

“Are they watching?” Joshua muttered against Hansol’s neck and for a moment he forgot how to respond. The older boys lips felt soft against the skin right below his ear, and this close Hansol noticed just how good he smelled. He let out a soft huff of air in response, making Joshua laugh softly against his skin.

He didn’t have to answer, because Joshua turned his head slightly with a sly little grin. Soonyoung and Chan were too busy trying not to watch them, and with that distraction hebounced the ball on the table while they weren’t looking, landing it in a cup. 

"It bounced!” He announced, pulling away from Hansol a little, though he still kept one arm around him. “That means you have to remove two cups and drink twice.”

“What? That’s not fair!” Soonyoung sounded scandalized but all Joshua did was shrug. The other two boys whined but drank twice anyway.

Hansol really didn’t know what was happening. The rest of the game played out like this, Joshua casually touching him, moving in close so that it looked like they might kiss, before pulling away just fast enough to shoot the ball while the other two were distracted. Joshua was grinning easily at him as he pushed their bodies together, acting more like some overly pda couple than two people trying to win beer pong. But Hansol didn’t really want it to stop either, so as flustered as it made him, he let Joshua do what he needed to until all their opponent’s cups were out.

“That’s not fair,” Chan pouted, though he didn’t seem all that mad about it.

Joshua shrugged innocently. “Not my fault I know you two can’t handle a little PDA.”

He turned to Hansol with a grin, holding out his hand for a high five. Hansol gave it to him but he felt a little dazed. He wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or the fact he really felt Joshua was going to kiss him multiple times tonight. Either way, it felt almost surreal.

“You two are so gross,” Seungkwan’s words were slurred a little and he hugged Hansol close, practically hanging off of him.

“We just make a good team,” Joshua snorted, swaying on his feet. Okay, maybe they all had had a bit too much to drink.

“Get home before it becomes my problem when I get back to the dorm later,” Jeonghan warned, cuddling up against Seungcheol to fight the chill. It was getting late, the cold fall air finally settling in. It was cold and the alcohol was definitely making him feel a little dizzy. It was probably time to go.

“Good idea,” Joshua mumbled, arms crossed over his chest as he let out a slight shiver. “I’ll walk with you guys.”

** —-  **

Hansol shivered, let out a shuddering breath that sounded deafening in the dark and quiet of the dorm room. He heard Joshua laugh softly before making a small ‘shhh’ sound, his breath warm against Hansol’s skin.

It was dark in his room, and the covers did nothing to help his view. He pulled them up fitfully to see Joshua between his legs, a finger to his lips even as he looked supremely amused at Hansol’s dilemma. They were in Hansol’s room, in Hansol’s bed, but that also meant Seungkwan was there, dead asleep and snoring across from them. Hansol’s legs were bent at the knee and spread so that Joshua could fit between them, hidden under the covers.

Hansol didn’t remember getting that drunk, definitely didn’t remember getting drunk enough to do this. He barely could remember getting back to his room with his RA. Joshua had been all over him during the party but that was to win their game. He didn’t expect it to amount to anything when they got back to the dorm-

The hand not shushing him was at the front of his sweats, fingers splayed out and palm rubbing slightly between his legs. He was so hard it forced another little whimper out of him, and he stifled it with his hand as he sat up a little more to watch. It was so dark in his room he could barely see his roommate. Which was kind of stressing him out a lot, because he did not want Seungkwan waking up to this. Yet, despite the dark, he could see what Joshua was doing so clearly. The older boy’s hair was messy from crawling under the blankets, but his eyes looked determined as his palm squeezed around Hansol’s dick, gripping it through the sweat pants and slowly stroking.

Joshua looked up from what he was doing and smirked, watching Hansol intently. It was clear he liked watching Hansol squirm under him, liked moving his hand in a way that made the other’s hips thrust up a little to meet it. Joshua locked eyes with him as his hands dipped under the elastic, pulling it down just enough to expose just how hard he was.

It was a blur, Joshua’s breath ghosting against him for just a moment before his lips parted, lapping at the head of his dick. Hansol had always thought about how pretty Joshua’s mouth was, how much he would like to kiss him, but he forced back a groan watching them wrap around him. Joshua looked up then, and Hansol could tell he was smirking around the length of it as they locked eyes and he pushed down a little further with a soft moan. The vibration of it made Hansol pant, feeling it was way too soon to be this close, but he ran a hand through Joshua’s hair, gripping the back of his head to push him down even further. This time, Joshua whined, the noise of it almost too loud, until it broke off into a choke as Hansol’s dick hit the back of his throat. That was enough, Hansol couldn’t handle that noise, he was going to-

He blinked, slightly delirious with the weight and warmth of Joshua now missing. Hansol squinted at the early morning light filtering between the slits of the blinds and a quick look at the clock on his desk revealed it was 6:58am. He was alone, except for the soft snoring coming from Seungkwan. Joshua wasn’t in his bed and Hansol realized that he never was. It was a dream, a dream that had left him with a very real hard on.

“Fuck,” Hansol groaned, pressing his hands to his eyelids as he pushed himself back into his pillow. As if his crush on Joshua wasn’t enough, now he was having sex dreams about the guy? Could he be anymore of a creep?

At least it was early and Seungkwan was still very much asleep, last night’s drinking had knocked him out hard. Hansol sat up groggily, head spinning slightly as he got himself upright. He was definitely going to have a hangover. But for now he needed to get rid of this more immediate problem between his legs and maybe say a prayer for good measure.

** —- **

Joshua was lucky in that he didn’t have a roommate this year, because when he woke up, it was to a raging headache. He was supposed to be the responsible one, had even drank water and taken pain killers the night before, but it still hurt to open his eyes to the morning sun. At least the room was blessedly quiet without someone else moving around in it. If only he could lay back and close his eyes and go back to bed for a couple more hours. Maybe then he’d feel better.

Except now he was conscious and while he lamented his drinking choices the night before, the memories of what he drank came with memories of the rest of that night. He had been all over Hansol, in probably the most embarrassing way possible. Sure, it was framed as a way to win their game of beer pong, but he wasn’t sure it was necessarily appropriate. Hansol had seemed flustered by it, which was cute and made him just want to push the younger boy more but he was starting to think maybe he had pushed too far.

For someone trying to act normal in front of their crush, he was failing spectacularly.

Because that’s what this was, wasn’t it? Joshua wouldn’t have tried so hard if he was just looking for a quick hook up, especially when the recipient of his affections seemed embarrassed but ultimately not that interested. He was so… _flirty_ that nigh,t and Hansol had been nice and let him do it despite it not amounting to anything. Joshua groaned at the revelation, knew that he had to talk to Hansol later and apologize for his behavior. Or at least laugh it off as a joke. We really got them, huh?

“Fuck,” he whined under his breath, one arm over his eyes to keep the sun out of them. His pounding headache was just getting worse the more he thought about what he did, but his phone buzzed, taking him out of his thoughts momentarily.

It seemed Jeonghan was just as hungover and just as desperate for some sort of relief, so the invite for greasy diner breakfast was put out there. Maybe it would help clear Joshua’s head if he could process what happened last night with people who were there. Or maybe it would make it worse, but either way he wanted eggs and bacon more than anything at the moment, so he crawled wearily out of bed and started to get dressed.

A couple minutes later he was out the door, shuffling groggily at a snail’s pace to keep his headache from getting any worse. It was still fairly early on a Saturday so the dorm was quiet, students sleeping off their Friday nights with no major responsibilities until at least Sunday night. That’s why, even in his half awake state, it was easy to spot the only other lone figure in the hall. Joshua gave them a halfhearted wave before his vision focused in and he realized he was waving at Hansol.

** —- **

After dealing with his problem, Hansol wasn’t able to get back to sleep. His stomach was doing flips, threatening to upchuck the water he had guzzled down frantically the moment he was finished taking a very, very long shower. Thank god the only person he had to share his bathroom with was still dead asleep. It was too embarrassing and his head hurt too much to really get into it, but he needed to relieve the pressure from his dream, vowing to try and scrub that from his memory forever. Sleep still hadn’t come to him after that and he was tired of sitting still in his bed, so as soon as his stomach felt settled enough, it was time to get up and force some dining hall breakfast down his throat.

The hallway should have been empty. It was quiet enough that he felt he must be the only person awake at this hour on a Saturday. Still, as soon as he stepped out of his room, he saw another person shuffling down the hallway towards the elevators. Hansol really wanted to know what karmic punishment he was supposed to be enduring when he noticed it was Joshua, who waved at him. Hansol waved back though he really was just hoping the floor would open up and swallow him whole.

“Hey,” Joshua’s voice sounded even softer than usual. He looked like he was barely awake, the cardigan he was wearing wrapped around him like a blanket. He had jeans and a shirt on in an attempt to look alert and alive, but he hadn’t been able to completely flatten his bedhead.

Hansol gulped. It was the same kind of pretty but disheveled look as his dream. Of course his mind had to bring him back to that when he had spent the past hour trying to stop himself from imagining it again. He was a creep, a certified creep, and if Joshua knew what kind of dreams he was having, he’s sure the other wouldn’t have stopped to talk to him.

“About yesterday,” Joshua started, breaking Hansol out of his horrible train of thought. The RA shuffled slightly, looked awkwardly down at an old stain on the hallway’s carpeting. “Sorry, I was really drunk. I hope I wasn’t too weird. I just like messing with those two, you know?”

Hansol looked a little taken aback but he shook his head, as gently as he could without his whole head splitting in two.

“No, no it’s cool I-“_ ‘I had a dream you sucked my dick last night’_ is not what he was going to say, but now that he was thinking about it again, it made the back of his neck feel hot. Joshua was just comfortable enough to bring Hansol into his prank. It didn’t warrant his mind deciding that meant Joshua wanted to fuck him. Or that (if he was being honest with himself) he really, really kind of liked that dream. Ugh, he was being creepy again. “Just don’t worry about it, it’s totally cool. I’ll see you later? I gotta eat something.”

It was the cowards way out, surely, but Hansol took it. Doing an awkward half salute, he power walked past Joshua to the stairs to avoid being in an elevator with him. It wasn’t like Joshua was going to know he had that dream, but he would have been thinking about it the entire time. It was gross, he was gross for having it when Joshua had started to become a friend. Friends don’t usually have dreams like that about other friends. Or something. Regardless, Joshua probably wouldn’t appreciate it much.

** —- **

“He hates me,” Joshua said it miserably, staring into his coffee mug. He contemplated if another sip would be good for him, or make him want to hurl.

“He doesn’t hate you, you’re so dramatic,” Jeonghan was a little crankier than usual, probably from sporting his own hangover, and therefor not as sympathetic to his best friend’s plight.

“I made him so uncomfortable though, Hannie. He didn’t even want to share an elevator with me. I’m an idiot.”

Seungcheol gave his hand an encouraging pat. “I still think you should just ask him if you’re that worried about it.”

Jeonghan nodded, stuffing home fries in his mouth and pointing at Seungcheol in a ‘_that’s what I’ve been saying_’ kind of way. He swallowed and took a large gulp of water, sighing happily as he sipped. “You’ve never had this issue before, what’s the problem now?”

Joshua gave his two friends a resigned look. “I think I might actually be into him. Like wanting to date into him. He’s very cute.”

The other two sort of made an “oh” noise, nodding in understanding. It was easy for them, they were all ready a couple, they didn’t need to think about the finer points of asking someone out. Especially because they had almost immediately gravitated towards each other to begin with. As much as it should have been easy, it was clear that Joshua had overstepped and even just asking at this point seemed like it wasn’t going to accomplish anything. He resolved to just give Hansol his space and put that entire night behind him for good. 

Still, Joshua couldn’t help but continue to notice things he liked about the other. Hansol had an easy going attitude and a kind smile. Joshua liked the way he couldn’t seem to sit still for too long and buckled over with laughter whenever he found something really funny. It was endearing, and it wasn’t helping him get over his crush. He wasn’t about to go ruining the peace by overstepping again, but it did lead to some interesting thoughts when he was sitting alone in his room at night. Not that he would admit that to anyone.

** —- **

Seokmin’s apartment was small, and in the confines of that living room with everyone talking, it felt deafening but Hansol was having a good time. He sat on the floor, back against the couch and head on Seungkwan’s shoulder, though he had to move back every time his friend would move forward and yell about what was happening on the tv screen. It was a chill night, everyone taking turns to play Mario Kart against each other with some weird drinking game rules attached. The doorbell was almost missed over the rabble and Seokmin got up from the couch to buzz whoever it was in.

“You kids are keeping out of trouble right?” That teasing voice was clearly Jeonghan, and the blonde appeared a moment later from the front hall, waving at everyone.

“Not if Chan keeps blue shelling me,” Soonyoung whined while the other one cackled.

“You need some parental supervision, so we’re here to provide it.” Jeonghan ushered his companion in. It was Joshua, rolling his eyes as he carried a large case of some cheap beer with him. When he noticed Hansol, he gave a half wave before immediately turning his attention to their host to find a place to put his stuff down. 

Hansol had, for the most part, pushed that dream out of his mind. Sure, seeing Joshua tended to make him remember it more often than not, but he wasn’t going to dwell on it. They weren’t exactly friends yet, but they were friendly to each other. Joshua seemed busy, too preoccupied to hang out for too long when they did see each other.Still, it was nice seeing him, so Hansol waved him over once he had made the rounds with everyone else and grabbed a beer. 

“Hey,” Joshua greeted him, sitting down on the floor, a safe distance between himself and Hansol. “How’s the party going so far?”

“Well, these two,” Hansol gestured towards Soonyoung and Chan heatedly trying to steer their cars all while drinking beer, all while getting entirely too into it. “Have been at it with each other for the past hour, it doesn’t seem to matter that this is a four player game.”

“At least it isn’t beer pong, right?” Jeonghan said, cheerfully, settling down next to his best friend, who gave him a withering look. “Pass a controller over here when one of you are done, we want to play!”

A couple of more rounds passed, Hansol getting a hold of a controller at some point. Jeonghan got bored, pushing his controller to Joshua and then pushing Joshua closer to Hansol, stating it was a better view next to him. They sat closer to each other now, shoulders pressed to each other and Hansol took a deep breath. They hadn’t been this close since that last party, Joshua pushed against his side, his lips at Hansol’s neck.

Joshua turned to him with a little grin that made his heart flip. “I’m definitely going to beat you.”

Hansol was shaken out of his reverie, scoffing slightly. “You talk a big game. You gonna try for a distraction this time too?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Joshua said innocently before he turned his focus to the tv.

Joshua had won a couple of times as he had promised, but for the most part there was always someone playing way better than the both of them, so they had given up after a couple of heated rounds. At this point, people were starting to break off into smaller groups, talking in the kitchen or walking into one of the bedrooms. There was a little balcony space attached to the living room, and at some point a couple of them went out for some air.

The air was slightly chilly outside, but there were plenty of kids standing out there, huddled together. Seungkwan immediately pressed against Hansol’s side with an exaggerated shiver, the two of them standing on a corner of the balcony. There wasn’t a great view but it was fun to feel the wind after being in the overheated apartment. Joshua stood by them, looking out at the street a couple of floors below and shivering slightly without his jacket.

“Come here,” Seungkwan motioned to Joshua while pulling Hansol’s arm around his shoulder. “His other side. He’s surprisingly warm, you know. It’s too cold out here.”

Hansol looked at his friend, eyebrow raised, but Seungkwan was ignoring him, beckoning for Joshua to move in close. Joshua looked reluctant, eyes darting from Seungkwan to Hansol, but a couple more people were coming in and out of the balcony space, pushing him closer to them anyway. Eventually, he shrugged, stepping forward so he could press against Hansol’s other side. Hansol all ready had an arm around Seungkwan, so he figured it was fine to put his other around Joshua, though he did it much more hesitantly. The older boy didn’t seem to have any issues with that arrangement, though he seemed a little stiff as he rested his head on Hansol’s shoulder. The three of them stood in that corner, pressed against each other for warmth.

They talked for a while but Hansol was a little more than distracted. The top of Joshua’s head pressed against his jaw at this angle and he smelled really good. Hansol was used to physical contact from a lot of his friends and he liked it, but it was different when you had a huge crush on someone. It was better to just push those thoughts out of his mind, and at least Seungkwan was here to animatedly joke about the cold and the party and how much they had all sucked at Mario Kart.

“Hey,” Jeonghan peeked his head out of the doorway, waving them over. “Aren’t you cold? We’re playing a game in Seokmin’s room. Come on.”

** —- **

Hansol sat on the floor again, Seungkwan on one side of him, and Joshua on the other. It was a little quieter in here, and everyone drank and talked easily with music playing quietly out of someone’s laptop speakers on the desk.

“Found one,” Jeonghan sounded satisfied as he entered the room. He was cradling beer cans in his arms but one was an empty bottle, which he placed carefully on the floor as he passed everyone new drinks. At this point, they were all several beers deep. “All this beer and there’s only like one person drinking out of a bottle.”

Jeonghan ushered anyone he could get to sit on the floor into a circle. He made sure they all had something to drink and sat down with a delighted look that clearly could only mean trouble. He placed the bottle on its side in the center, and it finally dawned on everyone what they had signed up for.

“Spin the bottle?” Joshua laughed at his friend, shaking his head. “Are we twelve?”

“Everyone here is cute,” Jeonghan shrugged, settling in between Soonyoung and Chan. “So unless you’re really afraid of seeing who you land on, it’s fine right? I’ll allow kisses on the cheek if you’re a coward.”

No one seemed to object, though a couple people giggled nervously. Jeonghan agreed to go first and spun. It landed on Seokmin who laughed a little as Jeonghan leaned forward and gave him a kiss.

“See? Easy.”

The game continued, though sometimes the bottle would spin and land on an unoccupied space and they would all groan. Some people would kiss on the cheek, others would go all out, everyone whooping as they kissed. Hansol had landed on Seungkwan at some point, who grabbed his face like they were in some kind of romcom, leaning in close before giving him a quick peck and pushing his face away with a gasp. 

“You two seem close,” Jeonghan watched them with his chin in his hand and a small grin.

“Who else is going to take care of him? He’s a disaster without me,” Seungkwan grinned, ruffling Hansol’s hair. Jeonghan watched them before turning his gaze over to Joshua with an unreadable look. Joshua didn’t comment.

A couple more rounds passed before it was Joshua’s turn again and he spun the bottle, waiting for it to slow. He had mostly gotten people on the other side of the circle, but this time it spun and spun before landing on Hansol. Jeonghan clapped, looking more excited than he had the entire game, leaning in to smirk at his friend.

Right. It wasn’t like this wasn’t a possibility but they had been able to just barely avoid getting each other during their turns. It was just a game, and everyone was playing, and it didn’t mean anything but this was Hansol’s crush. And the guy he had had a sex dream about just from being close to him. Hansol glanced at Joshua, who was just looking at the bottle like it had somehow betrayed him. He looked nervous in a way he hadn’t been with anyone else. Was it weird? Had Hansol made it weird somehow?

Everyone was looking at them expectantly. Joshua gave a nervous laugh, hand coming to rub at the back of his neck before he looked up at Hansol.

“We don’t have to if it’s weird,” Joshua said it quietly, though it was clearly heard. It elicited a couple boos.

“Uh,” Hansol looked confused. He wasn’t used to seeing Joshua look… shy? Worried? Either way, he wasn’t expecting this reaction. He hated to admit that it was cute in a way, even though his own heart was pounding thinking about all the times he wondered what it would feel like to kiss Joshua. “Why would it be weird?”

“Kiss all ready. And make it count.” Jeonghan said through his cupped hands. Seungkwan made a noise of agreement, clapping his hands.

Joshua rolled his eyes and inched forward. They looked at each other for a moment, both hesitating, before they closed the gap. The first thought Hansol had was that Joshua’s lips were incredibly soft. The second was that he didn’t really want it to stop. It should have been an easy peck, a quick kiss and then they’d move on. Except Joshua pressed forward and there wasn’t a single part of Hansol that wanted to move back, so he pressed in as well, deepening the kiss. Joshua made a sort of humming noise, low and pleased, that sent heat up Hansol’s spine.

“Ok, ok, you made it count,” they could hear Seungkwan saying as everyone laughed. They pulled away from each other, a little dazed. Joshua bit his lip, looking from Hansol’s eyes back down to his mouth. Hansol gulped.

“You two are gross,” Jeonghan laughed, shoving at them both. “Go get some air, both of you.”

“Okay,” Joshua said it simply, giving Hansol a searching look before standing up and nodding at the other to come along with him. Hansol stood, feeling clumsy on his feet, and followed until they were once again out on the balcony, the cold breeze helping to cool the redness on Hansol’s face.

The smell hit Hansol before he even saw it. There were only a couple of people out on the balcony now, passing around a joint. They didn’t seem too stingy about sharing and it was almost finished anyway, so they left Joshua and Hansol with it, heading back into the warmth of the apartment. 

“You smoke?” Joshua sounded curious as the joint got passed to Hansol.

“Sometimes?” As if to prove his point, he inhaled slowly but deeply, the smoke blowing smoothly out of his mouth. He obviously didn’t have his own place yet, so any smoking had to be done at a friend’s place. It didn’t happen often, but he was used to this kind of thing at an apartment party. “You?”

“Honestly? Not a lot. Just a couple times.” Hansol offered the joint and Joshua took it despite that comment, inhaling until he could feel his eyes water a little. He passed it along before his body could succumb, coughing roughly as he pressed his face against Hansol’s shoulder to stop it.

Hansol patted his back. “You okay?”

"Yeah, sorry.” Joshua laughed a little at the scratchy quality of his voice, shaking his head as he calmed his breathing down. “Told you I don’t really smoke much…”

Joshua trailed off, looking up at Hansol curiously. He reached a hand out, fixing the other’s bangs after a breeze ruffled them. Hansol didn’t move away from the casual touching, instead raising an eyebrow at him.

“What?”

“Not really used to seeing you without a beanie, I guess,” Joshua shrugged, glancing over the other’s face. Hansol became acutely aware that they were alone now, just the two of them on the balcony as the party went on behind them. They had kissed, a real kiss that Hansol really wished wasn’t interrupted. And judging from the sound of approval Joshua made, maybe he didn’t want it to end that fast either.

“You wanna try again?” Hansol held up the joint.

“I don’t think there’s enough for both of us,” Joshua pointed out. It was almost burned to the filter. “And I’m just going to cough again.”

“No way, no such thing as not enough for both of us.” Hansol laughed. “Trust me. Come here.”

Joshua looked curious, watching as Hansol put the joint to his lips and inhaled, keeping the smoke in. He gestured for Joshua to move even closer, putting his hand on Joshua’s cheek and pressing their lips together. The older boy seemed to get it, opening his mouth to the smoke and letting Hansol kiss him, and Hansol made sure to suppress his own pleased noise at feeling Joshua’s mouth against his. They didn’t kiss in his dream, but Joshua’s mouth was so soft and pliant against his it made him shiver little bit. They stayed that way for a moment longer before Joshua stepped back, taking in a deep breath and blowing the smoke out slowly. He looked a little dazed, a small smile working its way on his face.

“You kissed me.” It wasn’t a question, but there was a small bit of wonder in his voice. Hansol let out a huff of a laugh, stubbing the smoke out on the railing and tossing it over. Maybe it was the mix of beer and weed that made him feel relaxed and bold, even if he was still a little embarrassed.

"Sorry," He said, finally. “Should I not have?”

“God no,” Joshua laughed, hitting Hansol’s shoulder playfully. “You should really do it again, actually.”

Joshua was looking up at him expectantly, and how was he going to say no to that? It was hard believing this wasn’t another dream, he had spent the past month wondering what it would be like to kiss Joshua and now here he was, pulling the older boy closer by his hips and leaning in, pressing their lips together. This time, he did let a pleased little gasp escape him. Joshua’s mouth against his felt just on the edge of desperate, his skin hot against Hansol’s palms. It was soft at first, tentative, but he could feel Joshua smiling against his mouth before he pushed forward, moving himself into Hansol’s space. The older boy pressed Hansol up against the railing and he moved his hands to hold onto the rail to steady himself as Joshua kept kissing him.

Joshua wrapped his hand around Hansol’s neck, pulling him into the kiss, teeth scraping against his lip to let him in. Hansol obliged with a little huff of breath, almost a groan, a shiver running through him when he felt Joshua’s tongue lap against his lip and then in. It had been a while since Hansol had kissed anyone, and he was pleased to know that Joshua was really, really good at it. The heat pooled low in his stomach with every little gasp Joshua made against his mouth. They broke apart a second later, taking in deep breaths even as they stuck close, lips tingling. Joshua’s hand brushed along the back of Hansol’s nape idly, crooked grin on his face.

“It’s about time,” Joshua still looked a little starstruck but he was smirking now. Hansol blinked at him, still kind of stuck on the fact they had just kissed. Again. The older boy jokingly shoved at his shoulder lightly before stepping back, taking Hansol’s hand in his and pulling him forward, their fingers interlacing. “It’s cold. Let’s go inside.”

** —- **

_You’re in writing and producing right? Wanna help me? I’m trying to write an original song for a project._

With the amount of times Joshua swung by his room, Hansol had never actually ventured to Joshua’s dorm room before. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, and if he was being completely honest with himself, he was a little nervous. They had spent the rest of that night after their kiss sitting by each other, Joshua’s hand casually holding his. It had been nice but they hadn’t really done anything after that. Or talked much about it. Hansol thought maybe it was just a one time thing, fueled by drinking and smoking, but they had exchanged numbers after that and now Joshua was finally asking him over, albeit to help with homework. He’d be fine just doing that, of course, but he was hoping they’d get around to talking about that night and what it meant.

He knocked, and a moment later Joshua greeted him with a small grin. The RA was always beautiful, but even more so right now in his soft black turtleneck and jeans. Hansol had just changed from his class clothes into sweats and a hoodie, and maybe he should have felt a little more self conscious about it but it was comfortable and he wasn’t about to dress up while just hanging out at the dorm. Joshua didn’t seem to mind all that much, ushering him in to the surprisingly clean room. Hansol was used to his mess, but it seemed Joshua liked to keep his things in order. There were no piles anywhere, everything put away in a neat and orderly fashion. It didn’t look like anyone else inhabited the room, and he commented on that fact.

“My roommate this year actually transferred schools last minute, so they never showed up,” Joshua shrugged, settling on his bed and making room for Hansol to sit down next to him. “Got the whole place to myself.”

Hansol plopped down, looking at all the details of the room. It was very much Joshua’s space, taking over both closets and desks. And a small part of him kept thinking about how they really were alone now. Maybe they’d bring up their kiss from the night before. Maybe more kissing would happen. His heart sped up at the thought, but instead, he said, “If Seungkwan wasn’t my best friend I would almost say I wish I was you right now.”

“It has its perks,” Joshua admitted, grabbing for his notebook and pen. “So. I’m writing an original song to sing with my guitar, thought that was right up your alley Mr. Lyricist.”

Hansol laughed, scooting closer so he could look over whatever notes Joshua had taken, though he was definitely aware how close they were this way. He could feel the other’s warmth. “I’m going to be honest, I don’t know that much about writing ballads, I mostly write rap songs. You ever rap before?”

“Here and there,” Joshua tried to twirl his pen in a dramatic fashion but he fumbled his grip and it landed on the bed. They both laughed, Joshua grabbing for the pen quickly before Hansol could touch it and scooting so their legs were pressed together.

They talked like that for a while, legs pressed against each other and heads bowed to watch Joshua take notes. Hansol didn’t know what to do with his hands, didn’t know how much contact was appropriate. Joshua didn’t seem to mind that they were pressed together, side by side, and they had held hands the other night, but would it be weird at this very moment? Beyond sitting so closely, Joshua hadn’t made any move to do anything but discuss possible themes for his song, and Hansol tried his best to concentrate and not stare too much.

He failed. Joshua glanced up from a note he was taking and gave him a sly look. He finished his thought before shutting the book and glancing up. Their faces were so close. “You’re awfully distracting when you stare at me like that.”

Hansol ducked his head, hands placed firmly behind his back. “Sorry I just wasn’t sure-“

“It’s ok.” Joshua sat forward to set the notebook down on the floor, before sitting back up. He glanced briefly at Hansol’s mouth before their eyes met, his grin sharpening slightly. “It’s really hard to concentrate when I keep thinking about how you should kiss me again.”

“I can do that.” Hansol’s heart felt like it was pounding out of his chest, but he leaned forward, kissing Joshua softly.

“You can do better than that,” Joshua grinned into the next kiss, moving so that his legs landed on either side of Hansol’s, straddling his lap. Hansol made a small, choked noise and Joshua lost a little bit of his bravado, looking embarrassed. “Unless this is too much?”

“No,” Hansol said it quickly before shaking his head with a small, nervous laugh. “No I’m actually really glad that wasn’t a one time thing.”

“Me too.” Joshua looked away from him with a nervous laugh of his own. “To be honest, I thought you were straight.”

“Bi, actually, though this is still really new to me.” Hansol admitted, finally working up the nerve to tentatively move his hands from behind him onto Joshua’s hips, holding him steady. “I like kissing you though. I like this.”

Joshua grinned at his response. “Then do it properly.”

Hansol didn’t have to ask for a demonstration. Joshua put his hands over Hansol’s, giving them an encouraging squeeze to hold him a little tighter. Then, he moved to wrap his arms around the other’s neck, sitting himself comfortably on Hansol’s lap as they kissed. It was slow at first, Joshua’s soft lips pressed against his, hand rubbing soothing circles at the nape of his neck. Then, Joshua bit at Hansol’s lower lip with a groan, tongue lapping into his mouth as soon as it opened for him. Hansol’s mouth went pliant and Joshua gave a pleased noise of approval, pushing himself into the other’s chest, hand tugging at Hansol’s hair slightly. Hansol gripped at his hips for a moment, before sliding a hand up Joshua’s back and pushing him forward.

Hansol could feel the warmth spread down. It was all too much with Joshua’s tongue in his mouth, his fingers in his hair, and Hansol’s own hands on the other’s hip and lower back. He was getting hard, the heat of the older boy sitting firmly in his lap making him whine a little into their kiss. Joshua broke away with a soft huff, pushing at Hansol’s shoulders until he lay back against the bed. They stared at each other for a moment, catching their breath. Joshua shifted, ass squarely seated over Hansol’s crotch, and he was most definitely sure Joshua could feel how hard he was now.

“We aren’t-“ Hansol cleared his very dry throat, trying to sound not so incredibly turned on. “Getting much work done like this.”

It was a joke to break some of this tension, to maybe distract from the fact that even kissing like this was effecting him so much. Joshua smirked down at him, shifting his hips so that he could grind down a little on Hansol’s dick, looking satisfied when Hansol let out another soft whine.

“I mean I do want your help with this project, but I also really want to suck your dick.”

“Fuck,” Hansol’s dick twitched hard at the thought of Joshua’s pretty mouth on him. He let his head fall back onto the bed, completely overwhelmed. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Joshua mimicked with a hint of amusement. He lifted himself, prompting Hansol to scoot a little further up the bed, before settling himself back down on the other’s thighs. His hand snaked down Hansol’s chest before unceremoniously landing on his crotch, gripping him through his sweats and giving a firm stroke.

Hansol inhaled sharply, risking a glance up. Joshua seemed pleased, gaze focused on his hand stroking. That intense focus was too much for him to see right now, and Hansol tugged at Joshua’s other arm to bring the older boy down so that they could kiss again. Joshua’s hand never stopped stroking lazily as he kissed Hansol in a completely unhurried manner, mouth moving down his jaw to his neck, where he bit down just below his ear, eliciting another soft groan.

"I-“ Hansol couldn’t help himself, and Joshua looked up, waiting for him to speak. It just felt unreal that this was actually happening. It reminded him of the night a couple weeks ago.

“I, uh… I had a sex dream about this-“ he blurted out and Joshua paused, going still above him. There was a moment of silence before Joshua giggled, hand moving up to cover his face as he laughed.

“Well,” he said after a moment to collect himself. He removed his hand, showing he was a little pink in the face. “I hope I was good.”

Hansol nodded dumbly, ears bright pink after letting that slip in the moment. Joshua looked down at him with a curious expression before it changed, his sly grin returning as he hooked his fingers onto the waist band of Hansol’s sweats and tugged a little.

“Gonna have to see if I can beat dream me.” Joshua said it casually, pulling at the material until Hansol lifted his hips to help, and tugged the pants down, exposing just how hard he was.

Joshua muttered something under his breath, but didn’t comment any further, moving his body so he was no longer straddling Hansol. He pushed the other’s legs until he could fit between them on the bed, laying on his stomach, hand stroking at the other’s dick again. Hansol propped himself on his elbows and cursed slightly as he watched Joshua’s lips wrap around the head of his dick. The older boy’s eyes were closed, pretty mouth pressing down to take more of him in and it made Hansol shudder. He could feel Joshua’s tongue lap against the underside of his dick, soft lips tightening around him slightly while Joshua’s hand stroked at the rest he hadn’t fit into his mouth yet.

Joshua let up with a wet popping sound, moving his head down so that his tongue could lap lazily from base to tip before he put the head into his mouth again with a little pleased groan that reverberated against Hansol’s skin. He seemed perfectly content with taking his sweet time, going down only so far just to pull back and teasingly lick and stroke at him. Hansol let out a noise, halfway between turned on and frustrated, and he could feel Joshua laugh softly, his breath ghosting along his dick.

“Sorry, did you want something?” Joshua grinned against his dick before kissing at it softly.

“Please stop teasing me.” Hansol groaned out, laying back and placing one arm over his eyes. Nothing happened for a moment and then he felt the bed shift, Joshua tugging his arm back so that he could look into the younger boy’s face.

“Then make me stop,” Joshua gave him a challenging look, before moving back down, taking Hansol’s arm with him. He placed Hansol’s hand on the back of his head, encouraging the other to grip at his hair. Hansol did as he was instructed, giving the soft hair between his fingers a little tug.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m not going to break.” Joshua rolled his eyes, laying down again. He smirked up at the other, mouth so teasingly close to the head of Hansol’s dick again. “Plus, I like it.”

He didn’t wait for another response, mouth all ready on the head of Hansol’s dick, sinking down. This time, he didn’t pull away because Hansol’s hand was cradling the back of his head, tentatively pushing him down further. Joshua let out an encouraging groan, sinking further and further until Hansol could feel the back of his throat.

“Fuck-“ Hansol bit out, fingers gripping at Joshua’s hair tighter as he pushed down a little further. Joshua’s hands gripped at his thighs, but the older boy hadn’t made any indication to stop, even as he choked a little. But the choke turned into a soft moan, as he pulled back just enough to catch his breath before sinking back down again, throat tight and hot around Hansol’s dick. It was overwhelming and he bit back a curse, head falling back because watching Joshua choke around him was a sure fire way to make him come too fast. Still, he was close, and he tugged at Joshua’s hair to pull him up with a warning.

Joshua pulled back, mouth wet and lips slightly swollen, looking almost as wrecked. He swallowed thickly, taking a deep breath as if to collect himself before the smile returned to his face. He didn’t bother responding, deciding instead to just take Hansol back into his mouth, this time not needing any prompting to take it deeper. He bobbed his head, making sure it hit the back of his throat every time as he choked back a moan.

“H-hey,” Hansol said shakily, hands uselessly trying to grip Joshua’s shoulders to pull him back. “Fuck-I’m going to-_Josh_-“

Joshua stubbornly stayed where he was, lips wrapped tightly around Hansol as he groaned. That did it, Hansol came hard down his throat with a stuttering breath, Joshua’s throat working to swallow as much as he could. He pulled away then, wiping at his mouth delicately, hair and clothes a disheveled mess. He whined, hand going to the front of his pants where it was clear his dick was straining in the confines of his jeans. Hansol shook his head, desperate to catch his breath. He batted Joshua’s hands away, unbuttoning the jeans carefully and pulling the other’s dick out. He began to stroke, his other hand pulling Joshua from the back of his neck into another kiss, the fact that Joshua had just swallowed his cum made it feel hotter, lewder. 

“Wait,” Joshua mumbled against his lips, hands tugging at his turtleneck. Hansol backed off just enough for the other to pull the garment over his head. His hair was a mess, his lips still wet and his throat sounded used, but it was all incredibly hot, and Hansol immediately pulled him forward again, licking into his mouth as he flicked his wrist. Joshua’s cock twitched in his hand.

It only took a few more strokes before Joshua was spilling over into his hand with a content sigh. They sat there for a moment, catching their breath and taking in what just happened, until Joshua reached for some tissues to help Hansol clean himself up.

“Sorry I just used my hand after you did all that,” he tossed the used tissues into the bin by Joshua’s desk.

“No, it’s okay.” Joshua shook his head, still looking a little dazed. “I wouldn’t have lasted more than a second anyway.”

They both laughed at that, pulling their pants back up properly and sitting next to each other on the bed in a comfortable silence.

“Hey,” Joshua said it a little awkwardly, hands distractingly pulling at his sheets. “Just… don’t tell anyone we did this? At least not yet.”

“Oh I was planning on running to tell everyone all the juicy details,” Hansol joked and Joshua pushed him lightly.

“Technically as your RA, I’m not supposed to be doing this with you. So try to keep it on the low for a while, all right?” Joshua looked serious, so Hansol nodded.

“Yeah, of course. I wasn’t going to talk about… this,” he gestured at Joshua’s half naked state, “anyway.”

Joshua looked relieved, though he pointed a finger at Hansol’s chest and gave him a stern look. “That doesn’t mean I’m going to be lenient either. You still can’t have alcohol in your room.”

Hansol rolled his eyes, but he was grinning. “Yes, sir.”

Joshua’s eyes narrowed. “You’re acting pretty tough for a guy who was moaning my name just a second ago.”

“Yeah, well, you’re good. A lot better than dream you, actually.” Hansol shrugged. Joshua seemed to preen at that, running a hand through his hair to fix it even though he shivered a little at still being shirtless. Hansol smiled softly at him, amused. “You should get dressed if you’re cold.”

Joshua just crossed his arms, giving Hansol an unimpressed look. “If I’m cold, you should be giving me that hoodie of yours to keep me warm.”

Hansol decided not to point out that Joshua’s turtleneck was right there. Instead, he made a big show of unzipping his hoodie, dramatically pulling it down his shoulders with an exaggerated wink that Joshua couldn’t help but laugh at. The older boy took the hoodie eagerly, though, throwing it on and zipping it all the way up before putting the hood up as well. He looked cozy now, and really cute in Hansol’s opinion. He could sacrifice a hoodie for this.

“I don’t want to get back to work,” Joshua whined, resting his head on Hansol’s shoulder. Now that the tension between them was finally released, there wasn’t really anything in the way of them talking song ideas, but Hansol had to admit he was pretty content just sitting here with Joshua like this, talking idly.

** —- **

The need to keep everything on the DL around the dorm meant they didn’t really discuss their relationship much, even amongst each other. Hansol would meet up with Joshua on occasion to work on homework and would more often than notgo back to his room with his hood pulled up, hiding a fresh hickey on his neck. Seungkwan knew of course, because it wasn’t like Hansol could hide anything from him, but he had promised not to talk too much about it. He did make sure to taunt Hansol as much as he could when they were alone in their room at night.

It wasn’t that it was a bad arrangement, though. They clearly got along well. Joshua was bright and funny and a really good kisser, and when they weren’t kissing, they still had fun just hanging out. They’d text when they were bored in class. When they were at parties amongst their close friends, they would even sometimes hold hands. It almost felt like dating.

_Are you in your room?_

Hansol was laying idly in his bed, playing a game on his phone when he received Joshua’s text. He smiled as he responded with a _yeah, bored af._

_Seungkwan not entertaining you enough?_

_He’s out with his study group rn_

_you want me to come over?_

Hansol raised a brow at that. Usually, they hung out in Joshua’s room. It was clean and organized, unlike his mess of a room. They also hadn’t really had much of a chance to spend time together and it wasn’t like they went out on dates or anything. Hansol sent a quick _sure! _and got up to make himself look somewhat presentable. A couple of minutes later and there was a knock on the door. 

“Hey,” Joshua said it casually, slipping in before anyone else could possibly see him in the hallway. As soon as Hansol closed the door, the older boy turned, giving him a quick kiss. He blinked, still not really used to the small displays of affection, though he really did like it. Hansol smiled and sat back on his bed, making room for Joshua to sit with him.

“When’s Seungkwan getting back?” Joshua said it casually, pulling his phone out of his pocket and scrolling through his messages as he dropped his bag by the edge of the bed and plopped down.

“Probably not till late. They don’t usually get to the actual studying until way later.” Seungkwan liked to talk and most other people he hung out with also liked to talk. More likely than not, they were distractedly chatting with each other, completely forgetting the time and what they were actually meeting up to do. Joshua hummed in response, sending out a quick message before tossing his phone down on top of his bag. He took a deep breath, hands on his knees. He looked a little nervous.

“What’s up?” Hansol raised a brow, scooting closer.

“We’re alone.” Joshua stated by way of response. He let that hang between them for a moment. It was a Wednesday night, and most people were just getting out of their late classes, eating dinner, or hanging out in their dorms for the night. It was quiet.

Hansol frowned slightly, looking confused. “Okay?”

"And,” Joshua sounded exasperated, rolling his eyes as he closed the space between them, straddling Hansol’s lap. “We’re going to be alone for a while, right?”

Hansol laughed, easily placing his hands on Joshua’s hips. At this point, he was used to the other being on him when they were alone. It was still a little overwhelming, sure, but he had gotten used to kissing Joshua by now. Their lips met easily, Joshua wrapping his arms around Hansol’s neck as they kissed, completely unhurried. Sometimes, when Hansol was feeling exceptionally bold, his hand would dip a little lower, settled over Joshua’s ass. He did that now, Joshua humming with approval into his mouth as they deepened the kiss.

Joshua’s head dipped down, biting into Hansol’s clavicle before sucking hard, one hand tugging at Hansol’s hair. The younger boy huffed out an overwhelmed laugh, knowing that he was going to have another mark he was going to have to cover up later. In retaliation, he moved his head to kiss Joshua again, harder this time, hand squeezing at the older boy’s backside. When Joshua let out a little breathy gasp, he pushed his tongue into the other’s mouth. Joshua pulled away a moment later, panting softly as he ran his fingers through Hansol’s hair. He bit his lip, settling himself right over the other’s lap, where he was clearly getting hard. Hansol breathed out softly in response, trying hard not to push up into the other’s warmth.

“I was thinking actually,” Joshua started out casually, though he was clearly a little pink in the face. He let out a nervous laugh and Hansol’s hand moved back up to his lower back to rub at it softly.

“About what?”

“We should fuck,” it came out quickly, and Hansol’s eyes went wide, his own face turning red.

“Oh.” It was a very smart response, and he could have kicked himself for it.

“I mean only if you want to. I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable or like we’re moving really fast, or anything, I just really wouldn’t mind… is all.” Joshua shook his head, backtracking quickly. His sentence trailed off, and he sat in Hansol’s lap, fidgeting. “Sorry.”

“No,” Hansol said it quickly, trying to sound reassuring even as his heart was hammering in his chest. It’s not like they weren’t fooling around in general, but they had never really gone much farther than using their hands and mouths. Maybe Joshua was waiting for him to make the first move, though Hansol was content with whatever they did together. The only real issue was- “You don’t have to be sorry. I just. I haven’t actually ever gone that far before.”

Joshua gave him an assessing look. “Oh. You’re a virgin?” It didn’t sound all that incredulous but Hansol still nodded awkwardly. But Joshua just shook his head, smiling gently. “It’s ok, I don’t mind, if you want to try. We can take it slow.”

** —- **

Hansol’s hand was on Joshua’s dick, stroking softly to keep the other occupied, as both his hands were busy. Joshua lay on his back, one hand hooked under his knee, pulling his leg up. The other was currently pushing two fingers, slick with lots of lube, inside of himself slowly. Hansol couldn’t even touch his own dick just yet, the sight of Joshua whimpering under him almost enough to send him over the edge just from that.

Joshua noticed how hard he was staring and licked his upper lip with a small smirk, though his breath hitched as he stretched the fingers inside of him. “Like the view?”

“Yeah..” It was a little distracted. Hansol swallowed thickly. “Do you want me to do anything else for you?”

Joshua nodded, pulling his fingers out and taking a deep breath. He had brought lube and condoms in his bag, hoping that tonight was the night they’d go further. It didn’t really bother him that Hansol was a virgin, he had used his fingers on himself plenty of times and he kind of liked watching Hansol watch him. Still, it was a learning opportunity. He grinned and grabbed for the bottle of lube he’d tossed on the bed, holding it out and instructing Hansol to lather it on his fingers.

“Do like I just did,” he settled back, spreading his legs wide for Hansol to fit between. He grabbed his own dick, leisurely stroking as he gave the other a challenging look. “Slowly.”

It was fumbling at first, Hansol pushing his fingers in so slow it was almost teasing. It made Joshua grit his teeth, squeezing at the base of his dick and breathing hard with his eyes closed to keep from getting too worked up. He didn’t want to come before they even got started.

Hansol, on the other hand, bit his lip and did as he was instructed but fuck, he was hard. Every movement he made caused his dick to rub against his shorts, straining in the confines of his clothing. He wanted to touch himself so desperately. Or have Joshua touch him. But he knew that if he could hold out, it would get even better. Joshua was whimpering under him, eyes closed, and he made sure to ask if the older boy was doing okay. Joshua would always nod, letting out a soft ‘yes,’ hips thrusting slightly into his fingers. It felt almost torturously slow, but it was also kind of fun watching Joshua writhe underneath him.

“Okay-” Joshua gasped when Hansol’s fingers slipped a little further in, curling slightly and brushing against the bundle of nerves that made him whimper in surprise. He grabbed for Hansol’s hand, breath coming out in harsh puffs. “Okay, I’m ready. Stop before you make me cum.”

Hansol pulled out as Joshua sat himself up carefully, shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts. He looked around the room before his eyes settled on one of Hansol’s crewnecks laying on the ground. “Is that relatively clean? Let me wear it.”

Hansol raised an eyebrow but carefully moved himself to snatch it up. It was a school sweater that his parents had bought him his freshman year. He wasn’t brimming with school spirit but it was soft and he liked to lounge in it. He passed it to Joshua, who threw it on before pushing Hansol back on the bed until his head was hitting his pillow.

“Hope you don’t mind the sacrifice,” Joshua grinned down at him, carefully pulling at Hansol’s shorts and underwear so that his dick could spring out, hard and heavy. He pulled them down entirely, throwing the garments on the floor before sitting himself on Hansol’s thighs. “It’s easier to hide that that we're naked if someone comes in and I have to jump under the covers with you.”

Plus the crewneck smelled like Hansol and was warm and comfortable like the other hoodies he would often force Hansol to let him wear. It was an added bonus.

“Speaking from experience?” Hansol let his hands settle on Joshua’s thighs, trying to ignore just how painfully his dick throbbed to be touched.

“A little, but I don’t do a lot of sleeping around usually.” Joshua admitted with a slight laugh. “Actually I lost my virginity freshman year. In a threesome.”

“That sounds intense.”

Joshua shrugged. “A little? It was with Jeonghan and Seungcheol, though, so I trusted them a lot. It was a good time.”

“Oh.” It wasn’t any of Hansol’s business who Joshua was sleeping with before this but Joshua was still really, really close with those two, and it wasn’t like he and Hansol were necessarily an exclusive thing. They hadn’t discussed it, at least. It left a sour feeling in his stomach.

Joshua blinked, looking down at Hansol before his eyes went wide.

“Are you jealous?” He sounded way more delighted than the question should warrant. He leaned in with a grin and kissed Hansol on the cheek. “Don’t be. I’m way more interested in you right now. That was like a one time thing anyway. We work way better as friends.”

“And us?” It slipped out before Hansol could stop it, but it was about time they discussed it, even if they were both very naked and very hard.

Joshua laughed slightly, leaning down to kiss Hansol again. “Oh, we’re definitely not just friends. At least I don’t want to be.”

“Me neither,” Hansol said it easily, his smile fond. He pulled Joshua in for another kiss, slow and sweet, before the older boy shifted forward with a small whine. Joshua pulled back, searching for the condom he had tossed precariously by the lube earlier. He ripped open its packaging, carefully rolling it over Hansol’s dick before moving up a little and pushing Hansol back down.

“Just… stay still for a minute,” he warned, moving up onto his knees and positioning himself over the other’s lap. He could feel the head of Hansol’s dick against his ass and he shifted until the tip was pressing against his hole. He pulled himself down slightly, shivering at the stretch of the head pushing in.He could hear Hansol’s sharp intake of breath below him as the other boy fisted at the sheets to keep from moving too much. Joshua had to concentrate. They still needed to take it slow, even with all the preparation, and he let himself slip down further inch by agonizing inch.

“Touch me,” he didn’t mean to sound so demanding, but he was desperate for something, his patience wearing thin. Hansol bit his lip, nodding as he grasped onto Joshua’s dick, fingers slow and tantalizing, though it was clear he was just trying not to make too many sudden movements. After a couple more moments, Joshua was fully seated, taking a shaky breath and looking down at Hansol.

Hansol was panting, trying his best not to move beyond what Joshua was telling him to do, but the tight heat around his dick made him groan. Instead, he concentrated on gripping Joshua’s dick lightly, running his hand along the length until Joshua brought a hand down to stop him with a little whine. The older boy grabbed both of Hansol’s hands, placing them firmly on his hips in a silent command to grip them. Then he began to move.

Hansol cursed, hands tight on Joshua’s hips. He had his eyes closed in concentration but he looked up then, breath catching. There was a fine sheen of sweat over Joshua’s forehead, hair falling down on his face as he looked down with a small grin, his tongue poking out. His pace had picked up, pulling up to tease the head of Hansol’s dick against his ass before pushing back down again, hips rocking.

“Move,” it was an order but it came out more like a plea, Joshua looking down at him desperately. Hansol cursed, using the grip on Joshua’s hips to bring him down as he pushed up, making the older boy’s whole body jolt.

“Fuck,” Joshua shook his head, laugh sounding a little dazed as he placed his hands on Hansol’s shoulders. “Do that again.”

Hansol obliged and they fell into a rhythm, Joshua using his thighs to bounce himself while the other boy thrust up into him. Hansol moved one hand to grasp Joshua’s dick again, jerking along with each thrust. It made the older boy whimper, clenching around Hansol’s dick.

“Josh…” Hansol cursed under his breath, head falling back again and eyes closing hard. He was so close now, whole body trembling as he squeezed Joshua’s dick a little harder, movements becoming rougher with every passing second. “Please…”

Joshua looked down at him, grabbing Hansol’s jaw and holding him firmly in place as he moved down to kiss him hard. He pulled back a second later with a low whine. “Come for me.”

It didn’t take long with Joshua hot and trembling above him. A couple more thrusts and he was spilling into the condom with a grunt, hand continuing to thrust until Joshua spilled over into his hand with a low groan as well. It spattered over his hand and the clothing Joshua had borrowed, but neither seemed to mind as Joshua slowly pulled off of Hansol’s dick and sat back, catching his breath. They let themselves bask in it for a moment, before Hansol pulled the condom off of himself and Joshua took the crewneck off, using it to wipe them both clean.

“You’ll just have to clean it,” Joshua shrugged when Hansol gave him a grossed out look. “And don’t forget to.”

They got dressed, trying to make themselves look less like they had just fucked in case anyone came in. Joshua flopped down, making himself comfortable in Hansol’s bed and scooting as best he could on the twin sized mattress so that Hansol could cuddle up next to him. He laid his head on Hansol’s shoulder with a content sigh.

“So,” he muttered against Hansol’s neck, making the younger boy shiver somewhat. “About how you should really take me out on a date sometime.”

Hansol snorted. “I’m younger than you, shouldn’t you be spoiling me?”

“After what I just did for you? Hell no. Be a good boyfriend.”

“So we’re boyfriends now? Officially?” Hansol teased, moving so that he could sling an arm around Joshua.

“Well, yeah. I mean we can’t be obvious in the dorm.” Joshua said it softly, sounding a little less sure of himself. “But I want that.”

“Me too,” Hansol grinned, pushing his face into Joshua’s hair. “I’ll take you out anytime.”


End file.
